And now the news.
Is it just me or does the news on television actually contain hardly any news at all? One of the funniest things about it is how they tell you what's going to happen rather than what happened.
"The prime minister is expected to say that even though he did not leak the contents of his speech, Channel 4 news somehow got hold of the text anyway and would be informing the general public of what he was going to say before he actually said it."
Which begs the question, why not just leave it at that...
"Yesterday's speech by the prime minister was cancelled as it was widely agreed that what he was expected to say had already been reported and the prime minister had other things that he wanted to get on with. A source close to the prime minister refused to comment but was kind enough to hand our reporter a transcript of what the prime minister would have been talking about on his next appearance, which is of course due to be cancelled for the same reason."
Is that really news? Well possibly, but probably not. To start with its not bad news and if its not bad news then it doesn't count as news. At least in the olden days there would be one spot of good news right at the end as if the program editor felt bad for the audience who had to endure all the bad news that came before it.
Then of course there is the terror news. As if bad news was not enough. Nowadays the news must instil at least some degree of fear in the viewing public. Fear of terror, fear of war, fear of financial collapse. It's all good stuff. Well it is if you are a broadcaster at least.
There is also the news that creates news. Usually along the lines of
"House prices are expected to collapse..." or similar, resulting in mass panic which causes prices to crash just as the newscaster predicted.
Then there is the other part of the 'news' which is also not news where they interview people and ask them to comment.
"What's your view on what the prime minister is expected to say?"
Which is usually met with...
"I have already set out my stance on that question. And the answer is as I stated before."
"So the answer is?"
"The answer is the same answer as I gave previously to the question."
Well at least it fills up broadcast time. But is it news?
Then last of all we get the weather forecast. Yet more predictions of what may or may not happen with tomorrows weather. Come to think of it "what the prime minister is expected to say" may not be news but at least its generally accurate.
"The prime minister is expected to say that even though he did not leak the contents of his speech, Channel 4 news somehow got hold of the text anyway and would be informing the general public of what he was going to say before he actually said it."
Which begs the question, why not just leave it at that...
"Yesterday's speech by the prime minister was cancelled as it was widely agreed that what he was expected to say had already been reported and the prime minister had other things that he wanted to get on with. A source close to the prime minister refused to comment but was kind enough to hand our reporter a transcript of what the prime minister would have been talking about on his next appearance, which is of course due to be cancelled for the same reason."
Is that really news? Well possibly, but probably not. To start with its not bad news and if its not bad news then it doesn't count as news. At least in the olden days there would be one spot of good news right at the end as if the program editor felt bad for the audience who had to endure all the bad news that came before it.
Then of course there is the terror news. As if bad news was not enough. Nowadays the news must instil at least some degree of fear in the viewing public. Fear of terror, fear of war, fear of financial collapse. It's all good stuff. Well it is if you are a broadcaster at least.
There is also the news that creates news. Usually along the lines of
"House prices are expected to collapse..." or similar, resulting in mass panic which causes prices to crash just as the newscaster predicted.
Then there is the other part of the 'news' which is also not news where they interview people and ask them to comment.
"What's your view on what the prime minister is expected to say?"
Which is usually met with...
"I have already set out my stance on that question. And the answer is as I stated before."
"So the answer is?"
"The answer is the same answer as I gave previously to the question."
Well at least it fills up broadcast time. But is it news?
Then last of all we get the weather forecast. Yet more predictions of what may or may not happen with tomorrows weather. Come to think of it "what the prime minister is expected to say" may not be news but at least its generally accurate.
